One Step...

One step at a time. That is what it takes to get over a broken heart. And I have taken a few steps over the past two months. One Step closer to my heart healing... one step closer to my memory of him disappearing... one step closer to achieving my dream.

It might sound cliche but it is funny how true cliches really are, as stated once by Jack Ingram. "Keep on keeping on" "Dance like no one is watching" "Love like your heart has never been broken" So today I am "One Step Closer".

I have had a fun couple of months, especially this past month. My friends really pulled through for me and kept me occupied and busy not allowing me to ponder on the past or on him. I meet some new friends as well. A few who even made me feel beautiful and wanted. Although the last thing on my mind is a relationship I did meet one or two guys who were fun for a time. Who would take me dinner or to a movie when I really need to get out of the house. It is funny how these people come along when you really need to just get away. Not only did they keep me company but they also made me feel better about myself. Made me realize that as much as I blamed myself for the failure in my last relationship... because I really did... I thought I had gained too much weight... or was not as attractive as I once was... or maybe I was boring... or annoying... I am not sure what it was but I was certain that I had done something to drive my ex away... and now I realize that it was not me at all. That I am great, awesome, good looking person with a ton to give and who I end up spending my life with is one lucky man, and to all my exs, boy did you miss out on something good. As stated by my best friend Christa "I know you LeaAnn, you treat the men in your life like gold."

I had a fun fling this last month and I am little sad it has come to an end... but at the same time I knew that it was only matter of time. After all I am not looking or wanting anything and it is kind of hard to date a traveling sales man. Although it does make for a good story to my parents when they ask who I have been dating and I simply state "a homeless guy"... you should see the look on their faces. Well he's not homeless he just lives out of hotels... and his hotel is no longer in Midland, but it was fun while it lasted.

I regret to say this next month will not be as easy as the last. I am afraid that it will be the three month lapses... well I am not afraid I know it will be. As much as I will try to get my mind off of the breakup it will be hard, due to several reasons, the first being I will have more time on my hands because I will not be physically able to go out as often. I am having minor surgery next Monday and it is kind of emotional and scary all at the same time. (Please do not ask). Plus last October had so many memories that I shared with him that I will be remembering yet again, but alone.

Don't get me wrong I am happier than I have been in a long while. And truthfully I am happier single than with I was in my relationship, but there is just something about lonely that kind of stings. But lonely is a much less painful sting that loving someone who doesn't love you in return, so I can deal with the sting. But regardless of how painful this next month might be, both emotionally and physically, I will not let my one step closer take me two steps back, I am going to keep stepping closer.

I am Living Single in Texas.